Fish Training Kit

Any takers?

A NEW comic strip starts tomorrow!

Introducing: Elves

Ladies and Gentlemen, it give me much pleasure to announce the newest project I've taken on. "Elves" will be the Christmas show this year at the Strauss Theatre.

Why does that matter? Because I wrote (and will direct it) for them this December! After many months of hammering out a script "by Jove" I've got it!

The project was given the "greenlight" a few weeks ago I just have been too busy to announce it yet. You should start seeing this ad pop up on their website soon.

Even though the play is written, I still have a lot to work on. Such as the music, costume design and set layout. But I'm hoping to have it all completed by the end of the summer so we'll be ready to roll when auditions come along some time in October.

I'm super excited about it and just wanted to tell you the news!

Switching topics real quick, my dinner theatre "The Deadly Briefcase" has been called back to do another performance run tonight. It's for a private party so sorry, tickets aren't available for this one.

Also, for any of you wondering. My "I Love Lucy" play is slated to debut as the season opener for "Murder is Served" in 2014. I'm sure the lines for those tickets will be of Star Wars cinema proportions.

Avengers Desk

Something tells me Megan's going to ask for this for our anniversary.

TriForce Nightlight

Here's perfect solution for when things go bump in the night. Let your worries go when you roll over in your bed and are reassured that the complete TriForce is safe in your hands and Princess Zelda owes you big time.

Can't get much better than that, eh kids?!

Hilton Underwater Suite in Maldives

Right of the coast of the Indian ocean lies this little room at the Hilton Suites. I have no idea how much it cost but I'm sure it's in the $5000 per night range.

You walk down a tube into the ocean and arrive at your very own underwater suite complete with bed, bathroom and a ceiling full of fish. Feel free to stare at the million types of fish that will be swimming by you thru the night as you lay awake in your bed trying to understand why you spent so much money for this room.

Wi-fi is not available which counts me out from ever renting it.

Sorry, but my email comes first over Flipper!

Super Hero keyboard

Here's an idea. Take one super hero you know that begins with each letter from the alphabet and place it as a letter on a keyboard. And for the "space" bar? Excelsior of course!

What a cool idea. Too bad most folks use tablets, laptops and phones to access the internet these days. This could've been a hot seller!

The ultimate car decal!

May next car may have to have this on it.

Remember Commadore 64?!

I so wanted my friends to be knocking down my door and see pure 80's magic jump right out of my computer screen and around my room.

I'm so sad to discover this commercial was just about a bunch of kids tripping on acid instead.

Stupid lying commercials!

July Movie review

Hi folks!

It's that time again to talk about upcoming movies for July!

As you know July is full of "blockbuster" hopefuls trying to grab your cash. A perfect example of this is Despicable Me 2. Though the first was was ho-hum it made money. And money (not quality stories) is what Hollywood is all about!

Grown Ups 2. I predict this summer's suicide rate will increase exponentially in response to the opening date of this film.  

Lone Ranger. Congratulations Johnny Depp. You finally made a movie I won't mind missing in theaters.

 Pacific Rim. I know very little about this film so I really can't say that much about it. What I see looks interesting, though the jury's still out on this one.

Red 2. The first one was a popcorn pleaser, I'm sure the 2nd one will be as well.

 R.I.P.D. Hmmm...MIB 3 just came out last year so instead of calling it MIB 4 they opted for a new cast and same old tired story line.

Please see review of Despicable Me 2 and insert the word "Smurfs 2" as the title.

 Believe it or not but the Conjuring looks like a pretty good flick. I'm tired of the same old horror story lines and the fact that this takes place in the 60's is actually appealing to me. Watch the teaser with this scene at the end. You're guaranteed goose bumps at the end.

The Wolverine. (sigh) I'll watch it. The last one was ok, I expect this one to be as well. But these films really have no direction. They don't lead us to a bigger picture. aka, Avenger's really ruined a lot of future super hero films to come. They've set the bar so high that now if it isn't a movie about, Captain America, Thor, Iron Man or Batman. We really don't care that much anymore.

Turbo is another movie I know little about. It's a pixar film but I can't give the a "pass" just because of that. Not everything that comes out of them is gold. (Cars 2 anyone?)

Any other movies I missed? Any opinions that differ from my own? I bet there are....

Man of Kill review

Megan drug me to the movie theatre this past weekend to watch the worst movie I've seen so far this year.

This Superman movie isn't the worse. Superman Returns will always hold that record. But it ranks up there however.

Did you like the movie? Why??

First off we have a 20 minute sci-fi film showing life on Krypton . They got to show us cool space ship battles, laser guns and even Jor'El riding a space dragon! Unfortunanly this was an elaborate set up for a story line that wasn't needed. They just wanted to show a space battle. This time could've been better used to establish Superman's past. (Which they treated like a Momento movie)

*****SPOILERS****

So we start off in the confusing way ever as Superman is on a fishing boat. Why? Because we had to set up a scene showing off his strength. Seriously, that was the only point. They never told us how he came to be there or why. He just is. Now if at the end of the movie he'd gone back to working the sea in a low key position (instead of glasses at the Daily Planet) I'd have been all up for it. But no. It was just set up for a "cool" scene.

Didn't you love how the story line was so choppy they had to insert "flashbacks" to help move the story from scene to scene? It felt like a bunch of people got in a room and said "You know what would be cool for Superman to do?" and they came up with a few independent scenes for the movie and the director said "Geez, how am I going to make this all make sense? I got it! I'll just insert flashbacks through out the movie and pray people don't notice it!"

Good job sir. It worked on a lot of people in the theater.

Flash forward to Lois Lane who spends....days? Weeks? Months? Tracking down the origin of Superman and after all the time and money she finally does. But after Supes tells her a story about his past Lane decides to DROP IT?! WHAT?!

This makes no sense in a movie that has clearly established Lane to be a hard nosed reporter that takes her job with the utmost importance. Did the audience suddenly forget her introductory scene where she tells the military general in so many words "to stuff it" because there's a story here and she's getting it!

Oh and when she does, Perry refuses to print it so what does she do? Go behind his back and have someone else print the story for her. Because "people need to know the truth". Well I guess not Miss Lane if all of the sudden you're willing to bury a story you've been working hard on for a while because someone told you a sob story about their life.

Once you leave another flash back you come to Lane and Supes standing in the middle of a desert. (yeah, really confusing I know) Zod is landing to pick up Supes but for some unexplained reason he wants Lane to come too. Why? We never find out.

It's just another story plot where the writers needed Lane on the ship so she could meet Jor'El and find out how to stop Zod. Really, no other reason than that. But they couldn't be creative, they just put her on the ship and hoped no one in the audience noticed the big plot hole.

Once again....well done hollywood. Not many noticed.

Action after action scene happens after that. After a confusing "dream" sequence Superman starts fighting one villain after the next. I laughed out loud when I saw the "big" alien appear. He'd never been introduced in the story before that and it's obvious he was set up to be another "cool fight scene" for the movie. It served no point and reminded me of the classic scene in Raiders of the Lost Ark where a no name villain appears out of no where to fight Indy but instead of an elaborate fight scene, Speilburg slyly slips in a comedy shot of Indy shooting him with his gun and walking away.

Too bad it wasn't that easy for Supes.

I can't even speak of the ridiculous "terra-forming" machines plot point but I did chuckle when I remembered Jor'El's voice telling Superman earlier that "You were meant to save them"

Really?! Because Zod would never have come to earth in the first place if it wasn't for Supes. Maybe Jor'El should have said was "You will be a giant pain in their ass."  

Fast forward to the unnecessary final showdown between Zod and Supes where Zod tries to kill this people we care nothing for and Supes ends up having to kill him in anguish. Um....none of that made sense. I actually heard a few people in a Monroe audience left before this fight scene because they though the movie had gone on too long by them and was crap.

Score one for those folks.

The scene makes no sense. When Superman slammed into Zod at his home in Smallville he didn't seem too concerned about killing him. In fact, I'm pretty sure that was intention through out that entire scene. But now that he has him by the neck he...doesn't want to all of the sudden?!

"Oh but he did it to save those people!" you say. Ok, let's think about that..Metropolis is flattened, so it looks like millions of people have already died. Did Superman at any time stop his fight against Zod to (I don't know) stop one of the 237 falling buildings we saw in the film? Nah. He had other things on his mind. Let'em fall!

And why did they want us to care about the Perry White/Reporters side story? Perry had only 2 scenes earlier and the reporters we basically nameless until then, so why give them a side story unless... oh yeah. Another plot point. Mix the action in with a little suspense.

Don't believe me? Then off the top of your head right now, call out the name of either reporter that was with Perry White.

See?

Ok, that's my rant for the day. Superman sucks. I knew it would not let's move on and pray they don't make enough to turn this shlock into a sequel

Burger King's "McRib" taste test

In the Flesh

In the Flesh is a wonderfully intriguing story the deals with the after math of a zombie apocalypse. As the story goes, everyone who died in 2009 rose from their graves only to become real life zombies. Eating being and only being killed by a shot to the head.

Fast forward to 2013 where a cure has been found and the war against the zombies is coming to a close. The first round of former zombies (now know as the "partially living") are about to be integrated back into the same town they terrorized for the past five years to be back with their families.

However, is the town ready to accept them? Meanwhile, the partially dead are having their "zombie" memories slowly return to them. Causing some grief, other bewilderment and for few, joy.

Will the partially living be able to re-connect with their former families and become accepted citizens of the town? And who is this masked man on the internet who has mysteriously been promoting a drug called "blue oblivion" which promises to set the partially living "free"? Or what about the human volunteer army (which were proclaimed heroes during the crisis) do now that their job is essentially over and they must return to their natural way of living again?

WHO KNOWS?! BECAUSE THE STUPID BBC ONLY LET THIS GO 3 EPISODES FOR THE FIRST SEASON!!!!

It's been renewed for another season. Well big whoop. I got into this story and now I have to pray my interest holds out another year in time to see 6 FRIGGING EPISODES FOR SEASON 2?!?!?!

I hate BBC.

MMA Bed

Do you have dreams of becoming an MMA fighter?! Then make those dreams...uh...sweet dreams with this MMA Bed. You can silently slumber away inside this steel cage awaiting your next opponent.

Or

Your wife could come in to fight, make you scream like a girly man who eventually passes out in a choke hold at the end.

Or maybe you've had it with your disobedient son and you make him go to his bed where he and you will settle it once and for all!

The possibilities are endless...

Stun Knuckles

Hey ladies? Wanna knock a guy down on the first punch? Here's the way to do it! Taser Knuckles! From the makers who gave you sliced bread comes another brilliant idea. Whether the crook attacking you takes the hit or blocks the punch he'll still feel the fury of your fist with this device!

But this looks to me like a man's fist holding it. What on earth a dude would want with this device is beyond me. Maybe it's "Revenge of the Nerds" for the new age?

24 coming back!

Well, I know I said I wouldn't take on any more TV shows unless they were through but this one seems to be some what of an enigma!

24's COMING BACK with another season full of Jack Baur tearin it up and I'll be right there watching him every tick of the clock!

I loved this show. It was one I always used to watch back in the day and since it's coming back you KNOW I'll be watching it again. I can't wait! Though not a "full" season (12 episodes is rumored) I'll still enjoy seeing the mis-adventures of Mr Baur and friends.

Think about this for a minute. Depending on how well this show will be received upon it's return this could really change the face of television!

If 24 starts pulling in the big numbers again, other TV Exec's will be digging back through their trash bins to see what show's they can bring back as well. I hope it all works out.

I'd love for Fox to try and get Firefly back again for Season 2.......zzzzzzzz...wha?! Huh?! Oh sorry folks, must have been dreaming just then!

Disfusable Alarm Clock

How would you love to wake up every morning next to this? Though alarm clocks have gone the way of the buffalo since the invention of the cell phone this one may worth worth buying for the fun of it.

It works like a regular clock you just have to pull the red wire for it to stop.

Or was it the green one?

Blue?

Aliens Caterpiller P-5000

Some guy on Etsy made the actual "loader machine" and for the low, low price of $1600 you can walk around the comfort of your own home wearing nothing but the Catapiller P-5000. Besides winning a Halloween costume contest or being sent out into space with a bunch of gun-crazy marines who want to fight aliens, I see no other reason to buy this.

Then again...you never know. 

Dang cool stuff you can buy

Talk about drinking your breakfasy right?

That's not the half of it! I've been cruising the internet lately and have discovered some wild things you can actually buy online!

So for the next few weeks I'm going to be sharing me findings with you!

Keep in mind that all these are REAL products. Nothing's fake!

Get ready to be amazed...

Strat-o-matic Baseball

I remember when I was younger my dad brought out his old strat-o-matic baseball game and showed us how to play.

If you haven't heard of this before strat-o-matic is a wonderful game involving the luck of the dice and baseball strategy. You roll 3 dice (usually one red and the other 2 white) which decide the fate of your batter. The game plays excellently within the boundaries of the actual game and even let's you create your own "dream team" as well.

Remember, these things were made before video games such as EA Sports platforms were even thought of! The games popularity still exist today in a smaller market but has a strong cult following.

I loved the game so much that when my brothers got bored of playing it I started playing it by myself which is as exceptional as allowing the computer to play itself while you watch just to see the outcome. (I did this a lot on my NCAA game back in the day)

But to spice things up I added myself to the Mets roster, later I'd add my brothers to the Braves. When I realized I was having more fun playing with my families characters than actual ball players I took it upon myself to create my own league!

Just about everyone I know has a character card for my game now. It also became a great way to remember names of long lost friends I'm sure I would have forgotten by now.

Anyway, every summer I break out this game and enjoy an entire season made up of all the friends I know.

And no, my team doesn't win the World Series all the time. In fact, for the past 4 years my team's only won once.

I think the dice are loaded.  

Come in/Go away welcome mat

Now you can say what you really mean to all guest who visit your doorstep!

Feather Head

Let's go back to circa 2011 for minute.

REMEMBER WHEN GIRLS FEATHERED THEIR HAIR AND THOUGHT IT WAS COOL?!? I'm so glad this stupid fashion lasted only a year and I hope every girl who did it will hang their heads in shame as if leaving a Taylor Swift concert!

This was one of the STUPIDEST ideas I've ever heard of and about half the women I knew had it done to their hair back then. Why?! Why would you put a feather in your head?! Where was the sense in that? I didn't get it back then and I don't get it now.

C'mon ladies, be honest. Did you do this or not? If not, I bet you could name a few of your friends that did. Am I right?

Ok, I'm done talking about "fashion" time to get back to more manly subjects from here on out!

Grunge Style, and why it's still awsome today!

Ok so last week I spoke about the typical 80's fashions of what's still hot and what's not. This week, I want to address one other style I LOVED back in the day and still love to this day.

Grunge.

Using Kurt Cobain as an example is pretty close to what I mean but there are a few extra features to point out.

Grunge was all about feeling comfy in the worn clothes you always wear. For instance, our jeans weren't cut on purpose. They got that way over several months of hard use. (just when jeans are comfiest!) Throw on some old boots maybe an over sized shirt and a flannel shirt tied around the waist and we're good to go!!

DANG I LOVED THIS FASHION! The Mrs can tell you I still have a few shirts left over from those days and they're some of my favorite clothes I wear!

I had to throw my grunge jeans out last year but the material was so worn by then it'd started evaporating into thin air. But oh the good ole 90's grunge!

Any other styles you missed?

80's fashion that SUCKED then and STILL sucks today!

Alright, so I told you what I thought was cool still today in the 80's but what fashion's did I HATE back then and STILL hate today?

Let's look at a few...

The half cut jersey.

Remember when men used to wear the half cut football jersey to show off their mid section?!

This is a terrible example pick but I couldn't find the one I'm talking about, which leads me to believe they were so awful some "Web Guardian" decided to delete every pic of one posted on the www! (good for him!)

Anyway, I remember it being all the rage growing up and I thought it was stupid back THEN and I was 9! My grandmother bought me one for my birthday and had to go take it back to the store when she realized I hated it.

If anyone has a better pic of what I'm talking about. Send it to me and I'll re-post it.

I see these ALL the time at "retro" stores calling them 80's fashion but believe me they were few and far between for folks wearing them. I thought they sucked back then too! I knew one girl that had a pair and I think it was only to match what she had on that day. I tried on some when I was a kid and remembered thinking they sucked and how stupid people looked in them. (except when Debbie Gibson did it and that's because anything Debbie Gibson did back in the day was HOT)

I picked up a pair to look at just last year at a costume shop and it looks like they're made from the exact same crap material they were made out of back then. So they get an "A" for consistency I guess.

 The striped polo shirt of the 80's. It looked like sin wrapped in a napkin lit up and left on your door step for you to stomp out only to later realize you had nasty 80's polo on your shoe.

THIS was your great design in the 80's folks! Come to think of it, if you add yellow and make the lines smaller this WAS my shirt back in the 80's and mom made me wear them to school every week! I HATED those polos. (part of the reason I rarely wear polos today) I knew they were ugly back in the 80's when everyone was wearing them.

I think now everyone knows how ugly they were and I pray they DON'T come back in fashion again.

Well, that's the style I hated in the 80's. Did I miss anything? Let me know...
 

80's fashion that's STILL cool today!

Ok, I was thinking about this last week and there's some 80's fashion I'd STILL wear today (if the Mrs let me)

Let's talk about them and how cool there were ARE!

Ahhh.. the blue jean jacket. When I first got mine I can't remember who gave it to me but I'm pretty sure it was a gift from my grandmother. Anyway... I loved it. I wore it ALL the time. I even collected pins and badges to put on it for "extra coolness" even when the style was fading out in the early 90's I wore mine with pride!

I found it not to long ago and tried it on. Surprisingly it still fits (though rather tight) I wanted to wear it one night to a function but after receiving the evil eye from the Mrs I promptly put it away. Since then, I haven't been able to locate it, which makes me wonder if she got rid of it for good.

Either way, this fashion is only for woman or Mexican Highway workers of which I'm not in either class. It's sad because look at it....DANG THAT LOOKS GOOD!

The calculator watch.
I think this is the EXACT one I had as a kid and I thought I was the coolest person in the world because of it! I wore it all the time and used the calculator on it for the stupidest reasons. Like adding up things in the grocery store with mom just to see how much the total was, or random calculations just so people could see me on my calculator watch.

C'mon! Who WOULDN'T want that stylish thing on your wrist?!

Last but certainly not least were Roos. Shoes with pockets in them. See where it says Roos on the label? That is where you pulled apart the Velcro pouch and placed anything in the side pocket of your shoe.

I had a pair as a kid where I kept all my change. However, as time went by I had so much change in them it ended up busting through the pocket and all across the street I was walking down.

It was funny because I didn't notice it until some kid told me. Every time I stepped you could see I nickle, dime or quarter (cause silver is how I rolled!) where every footfall had been.

Awesome shoes. And if I had to do it all over again...that's what I'd still be wearing today!

What about you? Any fashion's you'd still be wearing today if ya could?

Fashion week on the blog!

Hey folks! This week we're going to talk about fashion!

I'm not joking.

I have a lot to say on the subject that I think is important.

Trust me, you're going to love it. I'm been sitting on these posts for weeks perfecting them.

So grab a seat turn the flash on your camera on and get ready to walk with me down the red carpet!

This is going to be great.

Remember Homestar Runner?!

Just think, 10 years ago this was THE site to visit. It seems as though everyone was saying quotes from Strongbad or Homestar Runner and now the site hasn't been updated since 2010.

Sad.

So what ever happened to them? Well, they went on to work on actual projects with Nickaloadeon and other companies, making shows for the masses while leaving there first fans out in the cold.

Actually, I have no hard feelings towards these folks. It was bound to get old after a while and they left at just the right time before it did. The garnered my respect however for never allowing 3rd party ads on their site which is unheard of in today's society.

But I do miss watching Strongbad answer an fan email every once in a while. (sigh)

It was good while it lasted wasn't it? If you don't know what I'm talking about check out there website at www.homestarrunner.com

As if peeing isn't already fun for guys...

You can literally rock out with...well you get it.

Ohea self making bed

I WANT ONE!

Morninghead

I can't believe someone actually thought about making this?!

Hop, the following suitcase

Pretty cool gadget, but based on it's size I think Megan would need about 17 of them for a trip.

Kuratas Robot

Yes it exist and if you have 1.3 million dollars you can get one too.

I so want 1.3 million dollars.

Skittles sorting machine

I don't know how and I don't know why.

The odd side of YouTube

So I showed you some wild stuff on Amazon, now it's time to show you some wild videos of inventions I've seen lately too.

The fun starts tomorrow so I hope you enjoy!

Tales of Dune

So I just finished reading the ebook "Tales of Dune" I LOVE the Dune series by Brian Herbert and Kevin J Anderson and this book is all the collected short stories in one volume.

Though the stories are excellent, for $3.99 I was expecting a lot more. I think you pay $2 more for the "Dune" name brand than anything else.

Other than that, I recommend hardcore sci-fi lovers read this series. Every story has been captivating. Even the short ones told here.